Wild girl attacks musical genius

A court hearing at Birmingham Magistrates Court has spiralled into the realms of fantasy, causing many angry tax payers to protest at what they see as a waste of public money. The façade started when a young woman, who cannot be named for legal reasons, attacked a musician she recognised with the contents of a can of coke she had just bought from a local newsagent. The angry owner of ‘Angie’s Daily News’ insists that she sold the can in complete innocence, not realising the purport of the aforesaid buyer.

Apparently, the victim of this premeditated attack was quietly walking through the streets of his home town, when he was set upon by a young woman with long, flowing red hair. “She was so wild, she looked like a Scottish barbarian” claims the young man, who confides that he now suffers from nightmares and cannot sleep after the effect that the attack has had on him. We can tell you that the woman made some comment to him about the Dr Pepper bottle he was holding, but when he answered her (in a very friendly manner) that he preferred Dr Pepper over any other drink in the world, she suddenly went wild, screaming that coke was the only drink to be tolerated, and proceeded to throw the remains of what was in the can, into the unfortunate recipient’s face.

Whilst it may appear to be a terrifying experience to go through, it still seems that it is a very small and petty matter to be making such a fuss of. The case was thrown out once, but when the victim of this dreadful attack appealed, the courts sprang into action, the outcome of which is yet to be seen.

The case continues.